EL (kesnit) wrote,

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I said this before, but since it happened again, I'm ranting again.

I am so sick and tired of being the "nice friend guy." I am tired of "you are such a dear, but I just don't think of you that way." I joked with a friend that I am considering becoming an asshole so women will start falling all over me. Obviously I'm not going to do it, but the idea was appealing for about 5 seconds.

I pride myself on being a nice guy and a gentleman. But it gets really annoying when what I pride myself on becomes the thing that keeps biting me in the butt. I spent some time last night listening to what is quickly becoming my "rejection song" - Tonight I Want to Cry by Keith Urban. Doesn't help much, but at least it helps me sleep.

I know I am leaving the area in a few months, so starting a relationship should be the last thing on my mind. But that doesn't mean I want my last few months to be boring. What happened to "summer flings?" :) 

I keep telling myself that there is someone for everyone, but it's getting harder to believe that. I'll be 33 next month. I know that's far from "over the hill," but it's a lot older than I thought I would be when I found the person I wanted to spend my life with. Of course, there's no guarantees I'll find her in the next year, either. 12 months from now, I could be sulking over the fact I'm 34 and perpetually single. *sigh*
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