I didn't write this; I found it on a forum I read a lot. However, I thought it was funny and wanted to repost it.
God: "Why should I let you into heaven, my son?"
Republican: "I voted Republican my whole life. I hated the same people You hate. I accepted Your only other son, George W. Bush, as my lord and savior."
G: "From what I can see, you spent your entire life stealing from the poor to give to the rich."
R: "But those are just blacks and illegal immigrants, Lord! They're just welfare-sucking burdens on society! They're not really people!"
G: "Whatever you do to the least of those among you, you do to me."
R: "But I was against abortion and homosexuality!"
G: "You think blowing up abortion clinics and tying gay people to a fence and beating them to death is going to score points with me?"
R: "But I thought all you cared about was abortion and homosexuality, Lord!"
G: "Did you give money to the poor like I commanded?"
R: "No, but I spent money on killing Your enemies in Iraq, Lord! I thought giving to the poor was socialism!"
G: "What part of 'thou shalt not kill' don't you understand?"
R: "But I defended the lives of unborn fetuses tooth and nail!"
G: "When I was hungry, you did not feed me..."
R: "But I was against abortion and homosexuality!"
G: "When I was naked, you did not clothe me..."
R: "You're not listening Lord, I was against ABORTION AND HOMOSEXUALITY!!!"
G: "When I was in prison, you did not visit me..."
R: "SHUT UP, GOD!!! I was against abortion and homosexuality and that should be good enough for you! I'm a Republican, we rule the universe, not you!"
G: "I never knew you. Depart from me, ye worker of iniquity!"
R: "YOU'RE A SOCIALIST COMMUNIST MARXIST MUSLIM, GOD!"
Today has been a wonderful day. My fiancee and I woke up about 8:30 and she made bacon and scrambled eggs for breakfast. Then we opened the presents my parents sent. (We'd already opened the presents from her parents, and already had our presents to each other.)
Then we sat down on the couch and spent the day watching episodes of Ace of Cakes and Mythbusters that I had recorded but we hadn't gotten around to watching. Around 11:30, she started making her family's potatoes au graten. (I grated the cheese, but otherwise was kept out of the kitchen while she cooked.) About 1, I pulled the ham out of the fridge and put the sweet potato casserole in the microwave. About 1:30, we started in on the "Christmas buffet." (Her phrasing, since we just left the food out to nibble on.) Around 7, I pulled the cheesecake sampler out of the freezer to thaw.
We made a huge dent in the recordings, but still have several episodes (especially of Ace of Cakes) to watch.
I realize I have not posted in quite some time. Law school has been crazy, and while I read LJ, I haven't actually written. But I just got news that I have to share.
Most law schools have teams that compete in simulated trials and appellate court. I tried out for both teams, but failed to make the first (of 2) cuts for Mock Trial. I had higher hopes for Moot Court, and my try-outs went REALLY well. But I was nervous since I thought my Mock Trial went well.
The list came out this morning. Out of 300 who tried out, they took 50. I was one of them. I am bouncing off the walls! I worked so hard to keep my hopes from rising too soon and being disappointed again. Now I can party.
I had to have fasting bloodwork done this morning. This is always an adventure since I am a rather difficult stick. Once the needle is in and set, I'm fine. The problem comes when (1) the phlebotomist cannot find a vein and keeps tightening the rubber strip, or (2) they think they found a vein, then miss and start digging around to hit it. Thankfully, the guy this morning found a vein quickly. Once he stuck, though, I felt the needle move and thought he was going to dig. However, it was only a slight shift of the needle, not a full-out excavation. After that, it was over.
My fiancee and I went to IHOP for breakfast, then back home at 8:45 for a nap. I have class at 12:30, and wanted to get some work done before class, so set my alarm for 10:15. I managed to get up and out the door with no problems, but I'm still groggy from the nap. I'm not in danger of falling back asleep. I'm just moving a little slow.
I have a laptop that I use to take notes for my classes. This morning when I opened it, it looked like someone had splashed black and red dye on the screen. Seems I shattered it somehow between the end of classes yesterday and the beginning of classes this morning. I can get through classes today, but need to buy a new one this afternoon. Crap...
As of 3:50 yesterday, I am finished with my first semester of law school. It's kind of strange to know that I have nothing that has to be done. No reading, no case briefs, no studying. Just a month off.
I have no idea how I did on my finals. My Property final was a nightmare, but we all knew it would be. The professor likes to throw in things we never covered in class, so a lot of it comes down to how good of a guesser or mind reader you are. The good news is that all classes are curved, so it doesn't matter how I did, but how I did compared to how everyone else did. Crim Law bothers me, because I know I blew the second essay. Multiple choice, short answer, and the first essay I'm pretty sure I did well. The last essay, I know I blew, and I knew it at the time. I threw as much applicable info in as I could, so I should get some points for it, but for the most part, I screwed it up. Contracts was pretty straightforward, mostly just a data dump. I have no idea about Torts. I wrote the heck out of the essay, and was still typing when the professor called time. (Unlike the other 3, the Torts essay and multiple choice were seperated. Rather than 3 hours to complete both, we had 80 minutes per part with a break in between.) The good news is that I'm pretty sure I found and discussed all the issues. The multiple choice is anyone's guess, as the professor is a sadist with his questions. Out of 4 or 5 possible answers, 2 can usually be eliminated right off, but the others require a lot of thought and analysis to decide which is the "best" answer.
My new apartment is a lot smaller than my old one. For this reason, I have boxes scattered around that I had nowhere to put once they were unpacked. (Most went to recycling, but there are several I wanted to keep.) However, Sylvia is moving in on Monday, so I needed to organize everything so there would be room for her stuff.
In the process, I found a box that I had thought was unpacked before. It wasn't. In it was a bunch of my kitchen stuff. (Strainer, glass bowl, boxes of tea, instant noodles and sauce, etc.) I had been wondering where all of that was...
I have a confession. I LOVE college football. I eat, sleep, and breathe college football. On Saturdays during college football season, I plan my days and activities around games that I want to watch.
Most of all, I love Virginia Tech football.
So when VT gets to appear on the national stage - like playing in the headlining game on opening weekend - I start bouncing off the walls. I have been waiting for this game since I first heard about it.
LET'S GO HOKIES!!!
Hey, I'm actually caught up!
September 3: I'm grateful to Jeep for putting large off-road tires on Wranglers. While other people were stuck in the water when the parking lot at the apartment complex flooded briefly, I drove right through it.
September 4: I'm grateful to the Law Student Division of the ABA for offering health insurance to law students. I just did the research and found I'll pay about 1/4 as much for that as I would to continue the insurance I had with the federal government.
I am WAY behind, so am going to skip a few days. Oops...
August 27: I'm grateful to the staff of the wing place at the mall who make amazingly good, just hot enough wings.
August 28: I'm grateful to the Geek Squad at Best Buy for figuring out what was wrong with my desktop and fixing it.
August 29: I'm grateful to my Contracts and Criminal Law professors for giving us the assignments through most or all of the semester so I can work several days ahead.
August 30: I'm grateful to the member of the law student community for posting the link to their case briefs. I don't copy them, but they make it a lot easier to understand what I am reading.
August 31: I'm grateful to the developers of Vampire: the Masquirade, Bloodlines for making a really good game that helps me destress.
September 1: I'm grateful to myself for remembering to put my rent check next to the door Monday night so I didn't forget to pay it today.
September 2: I'm grateful to the developers of Neverwinter Nights 2 for making an amazing game that so easily distracts me.